Monday, January 14, 2008

Montréal Canadiens at New York Islanders - Tues - 7pm - 15 Jan '08

What are these guys so happy about? (one might ask) Well, they're Canadiens for one. For another, they're going to Long Island to play the Islanders.
Why on earth would they be happy about going to L.I.? (excellent question!) Well, they're going to get a nice home cooked meal from their respective Mommies as those two gentlemen are Long Island natives, Chris Higgins and Mike Komisarek.
Why in the hell do we know dopey stuff like that? (O.K. now you're just being nosey.) Because down in the Hockey Night in Chinatown Corporate Bunker we have a magazine rack that has it's own measurable gravity. There's The Hockey News, Canadiens Magazine (the Official Magazine of the Montréal Canadiens, in both English AND French!), a bunch of old copies of Mad, Cracked, Crazy and Redbook (mostly Rev. Timmy's), some photoshop and design mags (Dave) and complete collections of both Modern Head-butting Quarterly and Punching Enthusiast (that would be Mike.) And of course tons and tons (and tons) of old pornography (Oui? They don't still print Oui, do they? Hey, ice dildos!)

So fill out your subscription card, grab your junk outta the freezer and get your mail carrier to shove you through the slot at...

Night in Chinatown


105 Eldridge St.

(btw: Broome Street and Grand Street)

Tuesday - October 30, '07

from 7:00pm till we get fed up and wander off.

This week:

The Montréal Canadiens at The New York Islanders
(alas, not in HD)

Some other ridiculous crap we found in the Canadiens Magazine includes a young Avril Lavigne shoving a goalie and going to the box.

It's not all that interesting (truth be told we didn't even watch the whole thing) but all this typing sort of fills up the white area (that's negative space to you college grads) at the bottom of the email.

The quick brown fox
jumped over the lazy dog!

Scotty knows we tried. He also probably wouldn't put up with this sort of half-assedness. And another thing, there is finally proof that the Toronto Maple Leafs are perfectly happy not making the play-offs or ever intend to win a Cup again: They turned down Scotty as sort of Grand Poobah for their whole organization. Scotty, we love you. Even if those stupid Leafs don't. (Here's hoping they trade Sundin. Criminy.)

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